DISCLAIMER: God designed the marriage bed to be exciting, beautiful, exhilarating, and EXCLUSIVE! Christian couples should have the most passionate, fun bedrooms in the world! That’s why I want to help women experience the breathtaking joy of godly sexual intimacy!
If you combine the deep, intoxicating effects of essential oils with a night of steamy, loving, touch, you’re going to be amazed by how totally “on board” your husband suddenly becomes!
In fact, you may come home to find a new stash of oils on your bed every night! You are welcome. A few years ago, when I came across this verse in SOS, it made me think of the natural perfumes we make with essential oils and the way they complement our own body chemistry.
“How much better than wine is your love, and the scent of your perfumes.”
Song of Solomon 4:10
So here’s why that verse struck me. Remember, a good “perfume” doesn’t cover up your natural scent. It enhances, personalizes, and magnifies it! Your own body chemistry mixes naturally with essential oils and creates a signature perfume automatically. A perfume that can DRIVE HIM CRAZY! Especially when your limbic system gets involved and you both have good memories attached to an oil.
Scent and touch are such an amazing combination for bonding with your lover.
Watch our Hot & Bothered Bedroom Oil Video Class:
Take Your Time
And remember, just like anything of value, practice. makes. perfect. The more the better!
And while you’re practicing, take the time to study and recognize one another’s desires and prompts.
Does his breathing increase or do you sense an excited response? Keep going. Does he not seem to respond? Try something else. Experiment. You have all night, darling! Take your time!
Be sure to let him know what works and doesn’t work for you. I assure you, it’s totally worth it to be honest about what you like and don’t like right from the beginning. Otherwise, you may spend years in futility.
Allow yourself time to relax and enjoy—to willingly respond and engage. Take the time to relish his touch – to memorize it – to linger on the very thought. Imagine, explore, feel, taste, smell, listen, watch, communicate, reveal, and enjoy!
My beloved put his hand
By the latch of the door,
And my heart yearned for him. – Song of Solomon 5:4
That “yearning” feeling is what we’re after. So, set out right from the beginning with a mutual decision to take. your. time. Most people spend more time planning dinner than they do planning a night of bliss with their spouse.
If you prepare a peanut butter and jelly night, it may be just what you get! So PLAN for a juicy filet mignon! Declutter your bedroom, take a shower or bath, fix yourself up, create ambiance, string lights, scent your sheets, and get ready for the best part of the day!
A bundle of myrrh is my beloved to me, that lies all night between my breasts. (Song of Solomon 1:13)
Men are created so differently than women. Many women who seem to have cooled off in the bedroom simply aren’t given enough time to get going (your husband may need to be taught how much time you need). That’s why practicing the art of intimate touch can be so powerful in heating things up! Neither one of you will be sorry!
Which Oils are Best?
Some simple “getting started” oils to have on hand are Ylang Ylang, Lady Sclareol, and Sensation. These are great used in an all-over-body or “intimate” massage oil.
Sandalwood, rose, neroli, and myrrh, as well as the Young Living blends, Present Time, Three Wise Men, and Surrender, are some of my favorite recommendations for intimate massage and sensual exploration.
Sandalwood’s mysterious musky aroma blends particularly well with the body’s own natural scent, making it perfect for a romantic evening.
Misty Moisty Mama
Yes, I used that word! Most of the oils I recommend can be used intimately and applied directly to “sensitive” areas. Yes, really. A woman I know recently told me that she discovered the blend Lady Sclareol helped with occasional dryness, and its gentle warmth helped to stimulate libido when applied/massaged…um…“directly!” (Yes, THERE!) Live a little!
I arose to open for my beloved, and my hands dripped with myrrh, my fingers with liquid myrrh, on the handles of the lock. (Song of Solomon 5:5)
You can also apply a drop or two of Clary Sage, Sensation, or Lady Sclereol (undiluted) to the inner thighs and pubic bone in preparation for…later.
Tell hubby you need a little priming first, and see if he minds getting you warmed up with a nice, stimulating intimate massage. I bet he volunteers for the job! And tell him it will be worth the wait.
Or, if you’re feeling daring, and want something a little more “tingly” for intimate massage or lubrication, try a drop or two of peppermint, black pepper, or ginger into a carrier oil like V-6, sweet almond, or coconut oil. Wow! But remember, a little dab’ll do ya!
Once again, while some of these oils can be used neat (undiluted) on most people, I still suggest that you dilute at first, or at least have a carrier oil on hand “just in case.” Everybody’s sensitivity tolerance is different, so try experimenting on less sensitive areas first.
Warning: Be ready! Essential oils in the bedroom can cause PFST (Post Fantastic Stress Transformation). May I suffer from it and never recover!!!! The brain often associates scents with memories; so, be ready to have flashbacks of the exotic evening you had with your beloved every time you smell your favorite intimacy oils…and try not to blush in public!
*Because everyone is different, I would suggest having a carrier oil available (V6, olive oil, coconut oil etc., just in case you or your husband find any of the oils a little too stimulating. And use CAUTION when applying a spicy oil to sensitive skin. Always either dilute with a carrier oil or have one handy, just in case!
NOTE: I only recommend Young Living Essential Oils, since lower quality oils may contain synthetic chemicals and cause injury.