The marriage bed is like a playground! It’s a place to make memories and have fun together. A place to sometimes get hot and sweaty and run through the sprinkler, but also a place to experience emotional release, sunshine, comfort…bliss! More than anything though, it’s a place to “become one.”
The Brain: The Most Important Part of Sexuality
Beyond fun, intimacy (and especially climax) causes the release of oxytocin, an important hormone in the brain—a hormone that is known to promote emotional bonding.
Oxytocin, combined with the way essential oils affect the limbic system of the brain (the area that controls emotions and stores memories), make essential oils a powerful and influential bonding tool— even a protection—for the marriage bed.
A bundle of myrrh is my beloved to me, that lies all night between my breasts. (Song of Solomon 1:13)
The Intoxicating Bedroom
The custom of scenting the bed chamber is an ancient one that goes back thousands of years! The exotic scents and sensations of essential oils will help make the marriage bed an aromatically rich, exciting, and pleasing experience for you both!
Prepare the Royal Chamber
After cleaning your room, mist the sheets with your favorite pillow spray (recipe below). Please do NOT use any sort of synthetic fragrance on yourself or your bedding! Check out my all-natural cologne recipe HERE.
Just before beginning your evening, start with a warm, lightly scented bath (recipes for tub tea HERE or Dreamy Bath Soak recipes HERE). Pay attention to which oils you chose for your pillow spray, so you don’t have clashing scents in the room!
“I have perfumed my bed with myrrh, aloes, and cinnamon…” (Proverbs 7:17)
Now, decide which Bedside Oils you’re going to use for the evening and place them in a decorative candy or tidbit bowl on a pretty tray beside your bed. Then, pour your favorite carrier oil (olive, almond, avocado etc.) into a decorative cruet and place beside the bowl for mixing later. Again, consider the oils you’re using in other areas of the room.
If it’s cold, you may want to warm your carrier oil in a small electric dip warmer ahead of time. I like to make sure my essential oils are never heated, so that they retain their therapeutic qualities. So, if you want to heat your carrier oil, I suggest you apply it to the skin separately from the essential oils.
Remember to consider all five senses (sight, sound, taste, touch, and smell). Scatter unscented soy or beeswax candles around the room or string lights across your bed or ceiling (sight). Turn off bright lights, computers, television, phones, etc.
Turn off the ringer on your phone and play soft music, creating a haven of peace (sound). Even the sound of a running bath can be romantic (but don’t forget it’s running!).
Taste can be an aphrodisiac too! Get creative with that whipped cream, those juicy berries, or creamy chocolate…don’t forget the chocolate!
Adding a little peppermint essential oil to a creamy chocolate massage oil like the one HERE may be just the memory-maker you need for your personal playground! Get creative!
I only recommend Young Living Therapeutic Grade Essential Oils, since I know and trust their quality first hand, and because lower quality oils may be dangerous.
Ready, Set, Play!
Exotic Pillow Spray
1 oz. vodka
1 oz. purified water
25 drops Sensation Essential Oil Blend (or other favorite single or blend)
2 oz. glass spray bottle
Melt in His Arms Diffuser Blend
6 drops black pepper
2 drops bergamot
1 drop Ylang Ylang
Midsummer Night’s Dreamy Bath Soak
1-2 C. epsom salts
5 drops sandalwood
5 drops Young Living Sensation Blend
3 drops Neroli (optional)
1 drop rose (optional)
Scent-sual Massage Oil*
1-2 oz. carrier oil
15 drops – Cedarwood
10 drops – Clary Sage
5 drops – Ylang Ylang
3 drops – Patchouli
1 drop – Myrrh or Frankincense
Steamy After Bath Rub*
2 oz. carrier oil
15 drops – Neroli
5 drops – Sandalwood
2 drops – Juniper
2 ylang ylang
2 drop black pepper
1 drop jasmine or lavender
“Turn up the Heat” Lubricant (for massage or lubrication)*
1-2 tsp. carrier oil
15 drops Sensation Oil (Or Ylang Ylang)
4 drops black pepper
2 drops bergamot
Exotic Nights Intimacy Rub (for massage or lubrication)*
(Perfect for the bedside oil bowl)
1 tsp. carrier oil
6 drops black pepper
3 drops sandalwood
3 drops Young Living Sensation Blend
1 drop bergamot
*Certain essential oils are considered “spicy,” so check your reference book and dilute with a carrier oil when necessary. And remember, everyone is different, so always have a carrier oil handy for fast and easy dilution, in case an essential oil proves to be too intense for either of you.
Read No Shades of Grey: A Black and White Seduction of the Mind – “Within the realm of marriage, the power of oxytocin is an awesome gift that promotes affection, excitement, and trust; it’s one aspect of the “glue” that God uses to bring two people together as “one flesh.” And within the mother-child relationship it creates a strong, foundational bond that is very difficult to recover if forfeited, neglected, or lost.”